I have talked about similar subjects before. I want to dig a little deeper this time. If you ask any single mom, do you believe in yourself?, her quick response will most always be yes. Even if it is not necessarily true.
I think many single moms have this idea that they have to be perfect. They are not allowed to make mistakes. Part of that thinking has to do with the way society tends to think about single moms. There seems to be a negative perception about what a single mother is.
I want you to get past that. Get past caring what those people are thinking and saying. Get past this idea that you are not allowed to make mistakes. Are you not human? Is it not true that nobody is perfect? So why do you feel that you need to be?
First thing you have to do is be honest with yourself. Take a good hard look at yourself and learn who you are. Over the years I have done this many times. Especially when I do something stupid. I talk to myself and ask why did I do that?
That is how you learn who you really are. Ask yourself tough questions and be completely
honest with yourself. If you don’t like the answers then you know what you need to work on. The great thing about having a conversation with yourself is that it is truly a private conversation.
Figure out your motivation in everything you do. In order to improve yourself, you have to really know who you are right now. Not the person you show to everyone, but who you really and truly are.
Once you know who you are, then you can move forward to achieving your dreams!
Garbage In, Garbage Out
Don’t let the garbage into your mind. What you believe, you will achieve. If you accept when someone says you will never amount to anything, then you won’t. Don’t let it in!
What Is Your Purpose?
You need to know what you are living for. It’s hard to know where you’re going unless you know who you are – your truth. Create your life roadmap by first identifying and prioritizing your values. This will give you clarity to know what you need in life as opposed to what you simply want.
Train Your Belief System
Ask yourself questions, as I said earlier. These are called affirmations. “Why am I so confident? Why do I believe in myself? Why do I trust my intuition?” are empowering questions that focus your mind on why you are, in fact, confident. It has been said that it takes 30 days to change behavior. It is something you have to work at every day. Just like a body work out, you have to work out your brain.
You’re NOT The Only One
You may feel at times that you are alone and nobody knows what you’re going through. I promise you, you’re situation is not unique. With the internet, you can find all kinds of online communities which will provide you with moral support and advice.
Embrace The Word “NO”
I have been told no so many times. Now I look at that as a challenge. Sometimes we will ask for help in a situation before we are even sure that we will need help. Simply because if we were to get help it would be easier. Those are the times when it is great to hear the word no. No just makes me want to succeed even more. And No sometimes gives me that extra bit of determination I need to succeed.
You Don’t Have To Do It Alone
Get rid of anyone who is negative in your life. I learned many years ago that if you don’t compliment my life then you shouldn’t be in my life. Learn to lean on people who are willing to be there for you. Accept their comfort and friendship. And accept their compliments. Compliments are those external affirmations, you need those as well.
Never Give Up
Dr. King said, “Faith is taking the first step even when you don’t see the whole staircase.” Have faith in yourself but also have faith in a higher power. Figure out what in life you can control as well as what you can’t control. Don’t worry about the things you can’t control.
Recognize the skills you have and the things you are good at. I bet there are many. You don’t have to be the best but I bet there are many things you are great at doing. Set small goals for yourself, they are easier to achieve and can bolster self-confidence. Don’t focus on your failures. I don’t even use the word failure. I feel like I just found out a new way to not do something.
Keep believing in yourself.
Excellent post Angela!
I absolutely “believe” that believing in yourself is the main criteria for success and it is so important for self-esteem.
Keep believing!
John
Hi John,
You are absolutely correct! You can truly believe things into existence. That is why it is so important to to keep those negative thoughts out. As well as keep negative people out of your life.
Angela
Nice Website. You are a on very good Topic that influences so many things. Good Luck!
Hi Michael,
I am so glad you liked it. Come back and see what else I come up with. 🙂
Angela
Hi Angela, honestly I’m in the midst of a divorce now, and I have a little kid with my wife. Kinda hard for me to go through this(I’m sure it is for my wife as well) but certain things have to be done. I”m just trying to put myself in the little kiddo’s shoes and see the future for him. It’s not gonna be bliss, but I’ll do my best to provide for him… your article has open up insights from my wife’s point of view, stuff that i can never imagine..and I thank you for giving me a chance to make a better informed decision in my divorce settlement…
-Nas
Hi Nas,
I am glad I was able to provide some needed insight for your situation. Divorce is never a pleasant experience. We can make it easier on our children and make sure they know that nothing is their fault. Good luck to you and your family.
Angela
Hi Angela, this post really hits home for me. I am a single mom, raised by a single mom, and I am always questioning my parenting. Sometimes I feel like screaming and crying, but I know that it will all be okay and if I try my best things will work out fine. It really is all about believing in yourself and trusting your own maternal instincts.
Thanks for writing this, I love the support single moms give each other, we just know how it is……
Best Wishes
Chels
Hi Chels,
We have to be there for each other. You also have to believe in yourself. If you don’t then no one will. You are stronger than you think you are.
Angela
Wow, really inpirational.. I think i’ll come here again in the future.
You show a great way to face Life and get focused on our goals.
Thanks for all the advices, I really enjoyed reading this.
Gonçalo
I’m so glad you enjoyed it. I truly believe we sometimes are our own worst enemy. You have to first believe in yourself and know who you are. You can accomplish anything in life.
Angela
What a great website.. So many people put themselves down and do not think they are capable of achieving their full capacity. This is the perfect website to remind people they can go out and achieve anything they desire.. Confidence is so important. A great site with wonderful information and a wonderful read .. thanks
Chris
Hi Chris,
I’m so glad you liked it. I agree. We all need to instill a greater confidence in ourselves. We can do anything in life. We just have to want it bad enough.
Angela
It is very important to believe in yourself. If you don’t believe in yourself, then nobody will. Very nice blog post and very inspiring. Really needed to read this. Thanks
It absolutely is. You have to believe in yourself first and then others will follow. State it as fact and you will believe it!
Angela
We all need to hear these things many times over throughout our lives, even if we believe them. Life just sucks that out of us. Thanks for such a good post!
Hi Sarah,
I agree. We should be told this many times throughout our lives. I try to always encourage my daughter in every stage of life. I know how important it is. We have to be our best cheerleader though! When we believe in ourselves, others will too.
Angela
Very deep message! Thanks for all the motivation in this post. I loved the video and its first sentence: Once you believe you are something, you actually embody it. OMG! I was so needing this post. Thank you Angela!
Hi Andrea,
I’m so glad it came to you when you needed it. Sometimes it just takes the right timing for a message to sink in.
Angela
Great post – very true and inspirational. My girls don’t expect me to be perfect, thank goodness! When I make mistakes, we laugh and call them “blonde moments”! 🙂
Hi Julie,
Absolutely! We are all only human, perfection is not possible. It sounds like you have a really good relationship with your girls.
Angela
Your page is full of excellent advice that anyone can use. People hear some of the advice all the time but when you see it in print where it pops on your attention getting page, it can really sink in! Keep up the excellent work!
Hi Mark,
Thanks for stopping by. I am glad you felt my delivery was done well. 🙂
Angela